Ever since I have had a consciousness of myself and an understanding of the concept of low self esteem, I have known that I suffer from it. Much of it came from growing up in a nuclear family where abuse was the norm. However, I also wonder if part of it came with my genes, or if I brought this with me to this lifetime (if you catch my drift).
In my twenties, I remember telling my homeopathic doctor that I felt that by existing I was using up the oxygen that more worthy people could be breathing. Undoubtedly, things have improved. As I advance on my healing path and hone-in my skills, I no longer live life as if it was a test I needed to pass, and as I mature, I am less concerned with pleasing people or trying to change myself to make other people happy.
People with low self-esteem need periodic outside reinforcement and feedback on how they are doing. I am no exception.
Years ago, when I used a local business model, it was easy to get positive reinforcement. I got instant feedback from the people with whom I worked. After lectures consultations or workshops, folks would give me immediate feedback on how happy they were with the event, what they learned, and how they felt they could make small changes in their spaces to change their lives. After events, people would approach me wanting to schedule consultations and buy books and products.
A couple of years ago, when I decided to switch to an almost exclusively online business model, things changed. Since I have little live interaction with people, I do not get that instant feedback. I don’t get to meet the people who buy my books and products. Only a small percentage of the people on this list ever write me back or make comments as replies under my blog articles. The only reason I know you open and read my emails is that my email service lets me know how many people in my list have opened emails and clicked on links.
This lack of direct, live communication with my audience has often stirred the old feelings of insecurity I had when I first started with Feng Shui. At times like this I have even doubted my own knowledge and my own journey in the Feng Shui path.
Since I need outside positive reinforcement, and that reinforcement is not available to me from direct interaction with clients and students, I need to have my home and my office give that feedback to me. (It is actually a lot healthier to set up your spaces to give you the right feedback, than to depend on other people to provide that for you!)
Today, I would like to share with you how I used Feng Shui to neutralize my tendency to low self esteem and insecurity.
This is how I did it:
- I replaced the low cost, though practical office furniture, with pieces I actually love, made from wood taken from renewable forests, but with a fine looking finish. Every time I walk into my office, which is a nook in my lovely family room, so I can keep an eye on the children, I feel good about my choices.
- I bought a beautiful Oriental style screen with a drawing of a cherry tree, to use as a background behind my chair, and to have a consistent image when I record videos or when I am interviewed online.
- I got all the books I have written and samples of my best-selling products, such as the professional Feng Shui Bagua Map, and placed them on the cabinet I have behind my chair, so that when I see myself on the screen during video-conferences, I also see the product of my work and studies in the area of Feng Shui for over 15 years — four (soon to be seven) textbooks, four healing books, and MP3 recordings for the Life Areas and the Five Elements!
I also got a small book holder to place on top of the cabinet too. It holds books that represent the knowledge that supports my craft:
- A Pattern Language, by Christopher Alexander
- The I-Ching or Chinese Book of Changes
- The Tao Te Ching, by Lao Tze, and
- Chuang Tzu: Basic Writings
In addition to all of the above, in the wealth corner of our home I placed two framed photographs, one of my husband’s graduation (he is a Chiropractor), and one of my graduation as an Architect, to remind us of all the sacrifices we made and all the effort we put into getting our degrees.
Setting up your spaces to give your self-esteem a boost is a cumulative blessing. The more you use those spaces and receive their three dimensional messages, the more these positive messages sink into your deeper mind.
Give it a try: make small changes in your home and office to remind yourself of your successes and achievements. Remove any items that remind you of bad times or that make you feel bad about yourself. When your space tells the truth about yourself, and that truth is good, you can realize your full potential. People with high self-esteem, do this naturally. If this does not come naturally to you, then you need to learn how to do it. If you love knowledge and are the kind of person who is always wanting to learn new things, consider taking a course.
If you don’t feel like telling the truth about yourself would give you a positive message about your life, then it is time to consider a Feng Shui Home Consultation to give your life new direction!